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Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity and politics don't mix." Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Project 2025, or anything like it. That's what he told me during a recent lunch date at Jersey Mike's. That's not a...
Arts & Entertainment

Once I Learned to Read, I Realized The Left Actually Can and Does Meme

The following editorial was written by right-wing commentator and Trump White House official Dustin Pewpsin. The opinions expressed herein are only those of Mr. Pewpsin, and not necessarily this outlet, its ownership, or staff. "It baffled me. Truly. I learn to read, and more importantly...

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History

Who Got Paid More to Suck Trump’s Dick: Stormy or Jim Jordan?

As far as the world can tell, there are two people who we can...
History

DeSantis: Florida History Books Must Remove White Wigs and Rouge from Images of Founders

With the stroke of his pen, Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis (Q) ordered all history...
History

Sorry Libs, You Have to Honor The Stupid Ones on Presidents Day, Too!

The following op-ed was written by Dustin Pewpsin, a conservative commentator. The views and...
History

DeSantis: NASA Has to Rename Black Holes Because All Holes Matter in Florida

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is on a mission to de-woke his state. During his terms...
History

Barack Obama Explains Why No Congressional Investigation Found Evidence He Tried a Coup

Shocking almost no one on Planet Not a Fuckwit, the January 6th Congressional Committee...
History

History: The Day a President Suffered Humiliating Insurrectile Dysfunction

In American history, there are many dates that carry more importance than others. July...
History

Historians Unearth Benedict Arnold’s PowerPoint Presentation

As it turns out, America's most infamous traitors perhaps might have one rather surprising...
History

Native Spends Columbus Day Telling Americans to Go Back Where They Came From

FALLBROOK, CALIFORNIA -- Tommy Curro, a member of the Pala Native American Tribe, made...
History

Where Does the Constitution Allow for Delusional Losers With Hurt Feelings to Be Reinstated?

Since November 2020, it's become increasingly apparent that millions of Americans are under the...
History

Texas Board of Education Eliminates Need to Teach Kids The South Lost

AUSTIN, TEXAS -- The Texas Board of Education, in a narrow, party line vote,...
History

Updated Rankings Show Trump Still 45th Most Intelligent Ex-President

Every four years, Americans go to the polls and cast their vote for president....
History

Boebert Introduces Bill Honoring Victims of 7/11 and the Bowling Green Massacre

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Freshman Congresswoman Lauren Boebert (Q-CO) hasn't done much by the way...
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Religion

Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity...
Arts & Entertainment

Once I Learned to Read, I Realized The Left Actually Can and Does Meme

The following editorial was written by right-wing commentator and Trump White House official Dustin...
Lifestyle

God Told Me Oklahoma Kids Will Be ‘Stupid as Fuck’ After the Bible is Taught in Schools

"...do they really think it covers me in glory to have a bunch of...
U.S. Politics

Someone Accidentally Sent Me a Copy of The Biden/Trump Debate Questions

Don't ask me how it happened, but it would appear that someone at CNN...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)