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Surely, We Don’t Expect Republicans to Suck Their Cult Leader Off All The Way from D.C.?

"Does anyone know how hard it is to have a long-distance relationship, much less a long-distance relationship with your cult leader's dick?" A lot of folks online have been noticing that elected congressional Republicans have been showing up to support Donald Trump while he's put...
U.S. Politics

A Firehose That Spews Diarrhea Told Me It’s Been Holding Mock Debates With Joe Biden

"...I'm not Harvey Keitel or Bobby DeNiro or anything, but I guess all that training at The New School might have paid off." Well, the stage seems to be set for at least a couple of debates between incumbent President Joe Biden and the man...

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Immigration

President Trump Forms “ICE-S” Squad For Hispanic or Muslim Deportation Arrests

Make America Racist Again...again.
Immigration

Trump Orders The Formation Of New, “ICE-S” Squad For Hispanic or Muslim Deportation Arrests

DAVOS, SWITZERLAND -- While traveling overseas to meet with the world's richest and most...
Immigration

White House Relieved Kentucky School Shooter Not Muslim Or Immigrant And Shooting Never Actually Happened

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Despite copious reporting of it, there was no school shooting in...
Immigration

Man Who Got C’s In High School English Demands Immigrants ‘Speak American’ or Go Home

"What do they think gives them the right to speak whatever language they want?"
Immigration

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Changing His Name Back To Lew Alcindor To Skip TSA Scrutiny

The TSA has been stopping Americans with Muslim-looking names so this NBA Hall of Famer wants to change his name back to what it once was.
Immigration

Mexican American Muslim Soldier Says He’ll Keep Defending America Despite Steve King’s Bigotry

Congressman Steve King is a bigot and white supremacist, but that won't stop one Mexican American Muslim from defending his right to be a bigot.
Immigration

ICE Agents Arrest, Move To Deport Anchor Fetus

Federal agents in California have arrested and will now move to deport the youngest undocumented life form in U.S. history.
Immigration

God To Send His Son Back As “Refu-Jesus” To Teach Americans How To Be Christian Again

Just how Christian are American Christians? Apparently if you ask God or his son, the answer is, "Not effing very." The more you know.
Immigration

Mobile Deportation Detention Centers To Be Installed Behind Traveling Trump Circus

In two cities, Trump and his sons announce two different things that are connected by a hot topic in the White House: deportation.
Immigration

Mahershala Ali Briefly Detained By ICE Outside Vanity Fair Academy Awards Party, His Oscar Was Free To Go

Best Supporting Actor winner Mahershala Ali was briefly detained outside a post-Oscars party while his award with a white-sounding name was let in.
Immigration

Undocumented Taiwanese Dreamer Studying Spanish In Case Trump Deports Her

Even though she's from Taiwan, one Dreamer has begun brushing up on her Spanish to prepare for a possible deportation by Trump.
Immigration

Refugee Happy He Fled Syrian War Zone to Live in American War Zone

The ubiquity of guns in the U.S. has one Syrian refugee feeling quite at home.
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Latest articles

Criminal Justice

Surely, We Don’t Expect Republicans to Suck Their Cult Leader Off All The Way from D.C.?

"Does anyone know how hard it is to have a long-distance relationship, much less...
U.S. Politics

A Firehose That Spews Diarrhea Told Me It’s Been Holding Mock Debates With Joe Biden

"...I'm not Harvey Keitel or Bobby DeNiro or anything, but I guess all that...
Criminal Justice

I Interviewed the Condom Donald Trump Didn’t Use When He Ivanka’d Stormy Daniels

"Prophylactic Americans have senses just like everyone else. And would YOU want to ever...
Criminal Justice

Who Hasn’t Told a Woman She Reminds Us of Our Child Right Before We Put Our Penis In Her?

"Turns out, most of us don't think about our kids before we fuck someone....

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)