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Nothing Says Understanding American Freedom Like Cheering for Teenagers to Get Beaten by Cops

"...one thing I have now learned is that fascism and freedom of speech are pretty much the same thing. I mean, if they weren't, wouldn't all the conservatives who were...raising alarms about the lack of free speech on college campuses be freaking out about...
Women's Rights

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I think a woman is programmed by God himself to be my willing sex and food preparation slave." If there's one thing we all know about abortion bans, it's that they keep...

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Immigration

5 Year Old Guatemalan Girl Pretty Adorable In Her Wee Cage Inside Her Sweet Little Concentration Camp

RIO DE VERGONZOSO, TEXAS -- She's frightened, terrified, even. She's lonely most of the...
Immigration

MAGA Boy: “Why Do Migrant Kids Need to Bathe and Brush Their Teeth If I Don’t?”

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- Right-wing podcaster, YouTuber, and country music singer-songwriter Jethro Bohiggins...
Immigration

DeVos Supports ICE Raids Because Her Drink Is Getting Warm

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Education Secretary Betsy DeVos told reporters today that she "completely and...
Immigration

President Trump Narrowly Averts the Crisis of Telling Mexico He Was Putting a Gun Up to His Own Head

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- At this hour, the Secret Service is reporting that a tense...
Immigration

Alabama Republicans Hold Citizenship Ceremony for ‘Fetal Americans’

INBRED MOUNTAIN, ALABAMA -- Republicans in Alabama held a special ceremony this morning that...
Immigration

Trump Orders ICE Guards Posted at Entrance to Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- As Disneyland Park opens its new Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge attraction,...
Immigration

Trump Supporter: “My Family Didn’t Come Here from Europe to Let No Immigrants In!”

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- On the latest edition of his podcast, right-wing YouTube...
Immigration

Stephen Miller Assures Red State Lawmakers Migrant Children Don’t Have Human Heartbeats

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- On a call with lawmakers from every state won by Donald...
Immigration

Trump Orders Disneyland to Post ICE Guards at Entrance to Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When Disneyland Park opens its new Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge attraction,...
Immigration

Trump Considering Order to Change “No Way, Josè” to “Not a Chance, Lance”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald Trump announced that he was "deeply and...
Immigration

Stephen Miller Wants ‘Brown Skinned’ Americans to Wear Special Sombrero Patches

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- White House Nationalist Insecurity Adviser Stephen Miller is the man behind...
Immigration

Kirstjen Nielsen Filling Out Employment Application At On The Border Mexican Grill

GOLD HILLS, VIRGINIA -- Former Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen will be...
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Latest articles

Lifestyle

Nothing Says Understanding American Freedom Like Cheering for Teenagers to Get Beaten by Cops

"...one thing I have now learned is that fascism and freedom of speech are...
Women's Rights

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I...
Criminal Justice

I Have a Wish List of Things Dark Brandon Should Do With His Presidential Immunity

Some people might really think that if the Supreme Court says presidents have immunity...
Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)