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Criminal Justice

I Interviewed the Condom Donald Trump Didn’t Use When He Ivanka’d Stormy Daniels

"Prophylactic Americans have senses just like everyone else. And would YOU want to ever...
Criminal Justice

Who Hasn’t Told a Woman She Reminds Us of Our Child Right Before We Put Our Penis In Her?

"Turns out, most of us don't think about our kids before we fuck someone....
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Lifestyle

Greene Decries ‘Cancel Culture and Fascism’ as She Chucks a Copy of “Maus” Into the Bonfire

INCESTLAND, GEORGIA -- Recently, a school board in Texas gained notoriety when it ordered...
Food and Dining

Brave, Maskless Patriot Would Rather Be Arrested Than Leave McDonald’s Without His McNuggets

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- At the time of publication, right-wing podcaster and self-described...
Science & Medicine

Anti-Condom Protesters Storm Porn Set and Demand Actor Be Allowed to Raw Dog Co-Stars

SLAM FERNANDO VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- A group of angry protesters, insisting they were there...
Science & Medicine

Are You Selfish or Just a Puss-Weed For Not Getting Vaccinated or Wearing a Mask?

It's a question as old as time itself. Well, it's as old as how...
Science & Medicine

New Policy Lets DeSantis Punch Kids in the Mouth for Wearing a Mask

TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDUH -- A new policy instituted by Gov. Ron DeSantis (Q-FL) allows him...
Science & Medicine

Local Moron Sees Inconvenience as Tyranny

LAKE SKIPPY, TENNESSEE -- Jack "Dipshit" McPhuckphace is known throughout his sleepy town as...
Science & Medicine

Greene: Car Seat Laws are ‘Tyranny’ and Parents Should ‘Resist’ Them

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Cloven-footed freshman Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) told a group of...
Science & Medicine

Pro-Life Republican Against Life Saving Vaccines and Masks

IDIOTSBERG, TENNESSEE -- Sam Bedford has been what he calls a "rock-ribbed, dyed-in-the-wool, Constitutional...
History

Greene Vows to Use Secret Jewish Space Laser to Destroy Pelosi’s ‘Anti-Semitic Holocaust Masks’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, Freshman Qongresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia threatened to...
Science & Medicine

Darwin Institute Encourages MAGA to Refuse Vaccine and Masks

"The Darwin Institute has always been committed to supporting any endeavor to prove evolution...
Conservative Media

Son Called CPS Because Parents Were Watching Tucker Carlson

This week, sister publication The Political Garbage Chute reported on quite a noteworthy event. In a...
Conservative Media

Boy Calls Child Protective Services After Catching Parents Watching Tucker Carlson

SMITHVILLE, GEORGIA -- Two parents are in custody, and authorities in their small Georgia...
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Latest articles

Criminal Justice

I Interviewed the Condom Donald Trump Didn’t Use When He Ivanka’d Stormy Daniels

"Prophylactic Americans have senses just like everyone else. And would YOU want to ever...
Criminal Justice

Who Hasn’t Told a Woman She Reminds Us of Our Child Right Before We Put Our Penis In Her?

"Turns out, most of us don't think about our kids before we fuck someone....
Lifestyle

Nothing Says Understanding American Freedom Like Cheering for Teenagers to Get Beaten by Cops

"...one thing I have now learned is that fascism and freedom of speech are...
Women's Rights

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I...

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