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Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity and politics don't mix." Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Project 2025, or anything like it. That's what he told me during a recent lunch date at Jersey Mike's. That's not a...
Arts & Entertainment

Once I Learned to Read, I Realized The Left Actually Can and Does Meme

The following editorial was written by right-wing commentator and Trump White House official Dustin Pewpsin. The opinions expressed herein are only those of Mr. Pewpsin, and not necessarily this outlet, its ownership, or staff. "It baffled me. Truly. I learn to read, and more importantly...

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Women's Rights

Rapist Worried No One Will Believe He’s Raped If He Can’t Remember Exact, Specific Details About Prior Rapes

LAGO DE DOUCHE, ARIZONA -- 36 year old Jack Johnathan Jackson is an admitted,...
Women's Rights

VP Mike Pence Will Push Congress For Law Stating Life Begins At “Pre-Cum”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This year, Vice President Mike Pence will make a joint address...
Religion

14 Year Old Girl Assures Trump and Pence She Wasn’t Really Using Her Reproductive Rights Yet, Anyway

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A 14 year old girl visiting the president and vice president...
Women's Rights

Florida Teen Skirts Waiting Period and Performs Own Abortion With AR-15

LAGO DEL DESESPERACIÓN, FLORIDA -- Back in April of this year, 28 year old nurse...
Women's Rights

White House To Push For Bill Outlawing Abortion After Point Of Erection

WASHINGTON, D.C. --  At a prayer breakfast in the nation's capital today, the country's...
Women's Rights

Local Man No Self-Respecting Woman Would Fuck Can’t Wait To Blast His Abortion Opinion At Full Volume

HALSTON, NEW JERSEY -- Jason Hubbard is a described "free market capitalist" with a...
Women's Rights

Town Douche Wonders Why There’s ‘Only 364’ International Men’s Days Each Year

CAPE FALLS, OHIO -- Today is International Women's Day, but for one local man,...
Women's Rights

Woman Executes Flawless Polite Stare While Boyfriend Expresses Horrible Opinion About Abortion For Millionth Time

CRAFTON HILLS, COLORADO -- Sources close to the situation are reporting that a local...
Women's Rights

Televangelist on Rob Porter Affair: ‘Sometimes God Gives Ladies Black Eyes To Save Unborn Babies’ Lives’

SYCAMORE GLEN, TENNESSEE -- Reverend Bill Millen is a televangelist in his home state...
Women's Rights

State Senator Wants Exception in New Abortion Ban For Rape, Incest, or Republican Interns

With a new 20-week abortion ban on the table and working its way through Congress, one lawmaker wants exceptions for Republican interns.
Pew Pew!

Planned Parenthood to Start Giving Away Free Guns With Abortions

Planned Parenthood is considering a bold, admittedly extreme way of making a point about constitutional rights.
Women's Rights

Woman Relieved Congress Wants to Control Her Vagina So She Can Focus On Earning Almost As Much As Male Colleagues

With a 20-week abortion ban passed through the House, one woman has found a silver lining in losing direct control of her vagina.
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Latest articles

Religion

Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity...
Arts & Entertainment

Once I Learned to Read, I Realized The Left Actually Can and Does Meme

The following editorial was written by right-wing commentator and Trump White House official Dustin...
Lifestyle

God Told Me Oklahoma Kids Will Be ‘Stupid as Fuck’ After the Bible is Taught in Schools

"...do they really think it covers me in glory to have a bunch of...
U.S. Politics

Someone Accidentally Sent Me a Copy of The Biden/Trump Debate Questions

Don't ask me how it happened, but it would appear that someone at CNN...

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