Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Disney’s Next Animated Film Will Feature Villain Obsessed With Genitals Named “Ron DeFlorida”

Entertainment trade papers are reporting that Disney Animation Studios has a...

If Musk Gets Controlling Stake, The First Thing He’ll Do Is Change Twitter’s Name

Billionaire Elon Musk recently purchased enough shares of Twitter to hold...

Gaetz Was ‘Really Hoping’ House Would Decriminalize Weed and Sex Trafficking Minors

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last week, in a historic, but almost entirely...

Donald Trump Has Been Reinstated as President. Of the Mar-A-Lago Buffet Line.

Finally, after almost two years of waiting, it happened. His wishes...

January 6th Committee Interested in How Many Pizzas Trump Ordered on Burner Phone

The January 6th Committee announced last night that it is extremely...

Greene Says She Identifies as ‘Madison Cawthorn But Without a Dong’

During a recent episode of Steve Bannon's podcast, freshman Congressmare Marjorie...

Disney to Sell MAGA Mickey Ears, Greet Republicans as ‘Domestic Terrorists,’ Not Boys or Girls

ANAHEIM, CALIFORNIA -- The Walt Disney Company has announced that it...

Matt Gaetz is Boycotting Disney and Will Take His Prom Date to SeaWorld Instead

This week, Florida's governor signed a controversial law onto the books...

Eric Trump in Hospital With Nearly Melted Hands Because Tried to Destroy His Burner Phone

Recently, reports have surfaced that on January 6th, 2021, members of...