Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Obama’s Gun Confiscation Count: Week #378

A look back at this week's Obama's Gun Confiscation numbers.

NC Republican: Feds Should Keep ‘Their Big Government Noses Out of Our Big Government Bigotry’

One North Carolina Republican isn't taking the DOJ's warning about HB2 lying down.

When Traveling in the U.S., Mexico Advises Citizens to Bring Bottled Water

The government of Mexico doesn't want its citizens drinking American water.

Carly Fiorina Hastily Canceling ‘World’s Worst Veep’ Coffee Mug Purchase

Carly Fiorina puts her VP dreams back in the box where they belong.

House Republicans Will Investigate Link Between American Cruise Ship in Cuba and Benghazi

An American cruise ship in Cuba means a headache for House Republicans.

Republican Voter Admits He Feels ‘Stuck Between a Douche and Another Douche’

A Republican voter can't decide between his party's two top presidential candidates.

Real Zodiac Killer, Tired of Comparisons to Ted Cruz, Reveals Himself

The Zodiac Killer is tired of being compared to Ted Cruz.

Donald Trump Announces His VP Pick — Donald Trump

Donald Trump has a unique choice in mind for his VP, and his name is Donald Trump.