Totally Bulls*it News

Can I File an Extension If I’m Not Ready to Control My Wife By January 20th?

I don't really want to go to jail because I couldn't figure out how to wrangle my wife's genitals into their holding pen before...

Greenwald Will Denounce Ukraine Invasion Just as Soon as Putin Says He Can

For several weeks, as U.S. intelligence agencies tried to warn the...

Since the West Started Sanctioning Russia, Don Jr Hasn’t Been Able to Buy Nearly as Much Coke

As Vladimir Putin's illegal, violent siege of Ukraine continues, the U.S....

Dems Offer to Exchange Jackson’s LSATs for Kavanaugh’s BAC the Night He Assaulted Blasey Ford

When President Joe Biden nominated Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson to replace...

DeSantis Politely Asked Neo-Nazi to Step Aside So He Could Scold Students Wearing Masks

TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDUH -- Yesterday, Sunshine State Governor and 2021's Donald Trump...

Barack Obama Explains Why No Congressional Investigation Found Evidence He Tried a Coup

Shocking almost no one on Planet Not a Fuckwit, the January...

Ukraine Government Designates Dead Russian Soldiers as Gender Neutral Public Bathrooms

While Ukraine is under siege from an illegal occupying Russian military,...

Sanctions Force Putin to Cancel Trump Family’s Quarterly Bonuses

When Russian President Vladimir Putin invaded Ukraine last week, it's difficult...

Trump Plans to Be Sitting on His Fat Ass While Brandon Delivers State of the Union Address

While President Brandon is delivering the very first State of the...