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U.S. Politics

A Firehose That Spews Diarrhea Told Me It’s Been Holding Mock Debates With Joe Biden

"...I'm not Harvey Keitel or Bobby DeNiro or anything, but I guess all that...
Criminal Justice

I Interviewed the Condom Donald Trump Didn’t Use When He Ivanka’d Stormy Daniels

"Prophylactic Americans have senses just like everyone else. And would YOU want to ever...
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Sports

Patriotic American Rooting For Socialist Countries to Beat U.S. Women’s Soccer Team

WHISTLING DICK LAKE, FLORIDA -- 34-year-old Marcus Palumbo is a self-described "über patriot," and...
Sports

Greene ‘Devastated’ She Wasn’t Picked for Olympic Equestrian Team

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Freshman congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) makes no secret of her...
Sports

Sha’Carri Richardson Suspended After Testing Positive for Snack Enhancing Drug

Olympic sprinter Sha'Carri Richardson will miss her signature 100-meter dash event at the 2021...
Sports

Olympic Swimmer Not Kicked Off Team After Showing to Up Practice Drunk

LAKE HOOCH, FLORIDA -- 27-year-old Olympic swimmer Ryan McGee will not be kicked off...
Lifestyle

We Asked the American Flag If It Felt Offended By Gwen Berry’s Political Protest

This weekend, MAGA social media was incensed by the actions of a black athlete...
MAGA News

Liberty Loving Patriot Wants Gwen Berry Deported For Disrespecting America’s Freedom Rag

SHITLIP, GEORGIA -- When someone asks 30-year-old right-wing YouTuber Matthew Palumbozo about nearly any...
Sports

Furious Trump Demands American Curlers Take Their Shots Standing Upright

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources within the White House have reported that over the weekend,...
Sports

U.S. Recruits Its Best Athlete To Winter Olympics Team

COLORADO SPRINGS, COLORADO -- In a surprising and completely unforeseen development, the United States...
MAGA News

U.S. Adds Its Best Athlete To Winter Olympics Team And He Will Compete In All Events

COLORADO SPRINGS, COLORADO -- In a surprising and completely unforeseen development, the United States...

Latest articles

U.S. Politics

A Firehose That Spews Diarrhea Told Me It’s Been Holding Mock Debates With Joe Biden

"...I'm not Harvey Keitel or Bobby DeNiro or anything, but I guess all that...
Criminal Justice

I Interviewed the Condom Donald Trump Didn’t Use When He Ivanka’d Stormy Daniels

"Prophylactic Americans have senses just like everyone else. And would YOU want to ever...
Criminal Justice

Who Hasn’t Told a Woman She Reminds Us of Our Child Right Before We Put Our Penis In Her?

"Turns out, most of us don't think about our kids before we fuck someone....
Lifestyle

Nothing Says Understanding American Freedom Like Cheering for Teenagers to Get Beaten by Cops

"...one thing I have now learned is that fascism and freedom of speech are...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)