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Mitch McConnell

Lifestyle

Nothing Says Understanding American Freedom Like Cheering for Teenagers to Get Beaten by Cops

"...one thing I have now learned is that fascism and freedom of speech are...
Women's Rights

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I...
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Religion

God Says He’s Getting a Lot of Prayers About Mitch McConnell Having a Stroke

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- The CEO of Holy Trinity Inc., one of the...
Food and Dining

President Runs Out of Dipping Sauce and Declares ‘National McNugget McMergency’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources within the White House are confirming that this morning, at...
Arts & Entertainment

Billy Joel Says McConnell Was Inspiration for “Only the Good Die Young”

NEW YORK STATE OF MIND, NEW YORK -- Singer/songwriter and piano man Billy Joel...
U.S. Politics

Nation Devastated to Find Out McConnell Will Probably Recover From Fall

Over the weekend, news broke that Senate Majority Leader and Satan's Best Friend Mitch...
U.S. Politics

“I’m Tired of These Baseless Smears on My Patriotism” McConnell Says Drenched in Putin’s Jizz

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A cum soaked Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-The Kremlin) told...
MAGA News

Trump Hires Detective to Find Mitch McConnell’s Russian Birth Certificate and Destroy It

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump announced today that he has decided to hire...
U.S. Politics

McConnell Assures Public He’ll Secure 2020 Election Just as Soon as Putin Says He Can

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, perhaps feeling public pressure after leading...
MAGA News

McConnell Confident Trump Can Fit It All In There

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- At a hastily convened press conference this afternoon, Senate Majority Leader...
Economy

Economists Predict Medicare For All Could Be Funded For 400 Years By Charging $1 To Punch Mitch McConnell In the Face

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A nonpartisan coalition of economists has published the findings of an...
Economy

Projections Show U.S. Could Fund Medicare For All For 400 Years Charging $1 To Punch Mitch McConnell In the Face

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A nonpartisan coalition of economists has published the findings of an...
Criminal Justice

McConnell: “Trump’s Not Above the Law, It Just Doesn’t Apply to Him”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell told reporters outside the rotunda today...
Criminal Justice

Mitch McConnell: “Trump’s Not Above the Law, It Just Doesn’t Apply to Him”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell told reporters outside the rotunda today...
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Latest articles

Lifestyle

Nothing Says Understanding American Freedom Like Cheering for Teenagers to Get Beaten by Cops

"...one thing I have now learned is that fascism and freedom of speech are...
Women's Rights

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I...
Criminal Justice

I Have a Wish List of Things Dark Brandon Should Do With His Presidential Immunity

Some people might really think that if the Supreme Court says presidents have immunity...
Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)