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I Have a Wish List of Things Dark Brandon Should Do With His Presidential Immunity

Some people might really think that if the Supreme Court says presidents have immunity...
Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
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Science & Medicine

My Grandpa Smoked for 50 Years and Died of Lung Cancer After He Got a COVID Vaccine

The following editorial was submitted to us by Frank Lee Stew-Pitt, who calls himself...
Science & Medicine

Darwin Awards Give Lifetime Achievement Recognition to Anti-Vaxxers Who Died of COVID

Each year, the Darwin Awards are handed to some of humanity's least best and...
Science & Medicine

CDC Says It’s Now Safe to Remove Your Mask In Order Tell Ted Cruz to Fuck Himself

ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- The Centers for Disease Control has issued the following update to...
Lifestyle

Greene Decries ‘Cancel Culture and Fascism’ as She Chucks a Copy of “Maus” Into the Bonfire

INCESTLAND, GEORGIA -- Recently, a school board in Texas gained notoriety when it ordered...
Science & Medicine

Why Didn’t His Natural Immunity to Crashes Keep Him Being Thrown From His Car?

LAKE FARTFACE, MICHIGAN -- Friends and family gathered this week to bury Larry Lombowski,...
Conservative Media

Dan Bongino: “Crosswalks Tyrannize Drivers Who Don’t Want to Slow Down for Pedestrians”

LAKE MORON, FLORIDA -- An angry, teary-eyed Dan Bongino -- thrice failed congressional candidate...
Science & Medicine

NFL Approves Rule Change Forcing Anti-Vaxxer Players to Remove Their Helmets and Pads

NFL players who are anti-vaccine will be forced to strip off their pads and...
Science & Medicine

Fauci to Paul: “In My Non Self-Certified Medical Opinion, You’re a Bitch-Ass Lying Traitor”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- After two years of the global COVID-19 pandemic and the federal...
Science & Medicine

Op-Ed: How Come I Drank Gallons of Trump’s Pee and Still Got COVID?

The following editorial was written and submitted by Congressman Matt Gaetz (Q-FL). The views...
Food and Dining

Brave, Maskless Patriot Would Rather Be Arrested Than Leave McDonald’s Without His McNuggets

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- At the time of publication, right-wing podcaster and self-described...
Business

Listerine Contradicts Ron Johnson, Says It’s Intended for Recovering Alcoholics Sneaking Booze

Mouthwash maker Listerine is not useful in fighting COVID-19, the company said in a...
Religion

Satan Offers to Send Emerald Robinson to Med School

HELL -- NewsMax reporter and chief White House correspondent Emerald Robinson was permanently banned...
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Latest articles

Criminal Justice

I Have a Wish List of Things Dark Brandon Should Do With His Presidential Immunity

Some people might really think that if the Supreme Court says presidents have immunity...
Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)