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Criminal Justice
Surely, We Don’t Expect Republicans to Suck Their Cult Leader Off All The Way from D.C.?
"Does anyone know how hard it is to have a long-distance relationship, much less...
May 17, 2024
U.S. Politics
A Firehose That Spews Diarrhea Told Me It’s Been Holding Mock Debates With Joe Biden
"...I'm not Harvey Keitel or Bobby DeNiro or anything, but I guess all that...
May 15, 2024
MAGA News
Trump Campaign to Hold Amazon Kindle Burning
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The President Trump re-election campaign has announced that they will be...
July 30, 2019
Business
Fuming Bezos Threatens Hostile Takeover of Offensive Crayons Over Amazon Day Buttplug Protest
SEATTLE, WASHINGTON -- Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos is reportedly "livid beyond all recognition" and...
July 16, 2019
Business
Amazon Starts Same-Day Coat Hanger Deliveries in Alabama, Georgia, Ohio, Missouri
SEATTLE, WASHINGTON -- Scientific and news outlet Alternative Science reported recently that retail monolith...
May 20, 2019
Business
Amazon Working On Rectal Recognition Software So You Always Know Who Dealt It
(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); SEATTLE, WASHINGTON -- Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos announced today that...
August 20, 2018
Business
To Thwart Package Thieves, Next Year Amazon Will Only Offer Shitty Products
There can be very little doubt left at this point that when it comes...
April 25, 2018
Latest articles
Criminal Justice
Surely, We Don’t Expect Republicans to Suck Their Cult Leader Off All The Way from D.C.?
"Does anyone know how hard it is to have a long-distance relationship, much less...
May 17, 2024
U.S. Politics
A Firehose That Spews Diarrhea Told Me It’s Been Holding Mock Debates With Joe Biden
"...I'm not Harvey Keitel or Bobby DeNiro or anything, but I guess all that...
May 15, 2024
Criminal Justice
I Interviewed the Condom Donald Trump Didn’t Use When He Ivanka’d Stormy Daniels
"Prophylactic Americans have senses just like everyone else. And would YOU want to ever...
May 10, 2024
Criminal Justice
Who Hasn’t Told a Woman She Reminds Us of Our Child Right Before We Put Our Penis In Her?
"Turns out, most of us don't think about our kids before we fuck someone....
May 8, 2024
