Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

NRA Executive: 45 School Shootings ‘Too Soon’ To Talk About Guns

How many school shootings in a year does the NRA think warrant a discussion about guns in America?

10 Dead in Mass Second Amendment Demonstration at Oregon Community College

A mass Second Amendment demonstration has taken place at Umpqua Community College in Oregon, leaving ten dead.

Carly Fiorina Reflects on the Time She Cast The One Ring Into the Fires of Mt. Doom

Carly Fiorina's penchant for exaggeration keeps on keepin' on.

Trey Gowdy To Give Kevin McCarthy a ‘Hearty Spanking’ For Benghazi Investigation Comments

Kevin McCarthy is in for a little corporal punishment for his Benghazi hearing gaffe on Hannity.

Nearly A Million People Have Donated to Presidential Campaign That Cannot Win

Since when did being popular mean you win elections, Bernie Sanders?

Carly Fiorina Fondly Recounts the Time She Found Atlantis

Did you know Carly Fiorina once found the Lost City of Atlantis? Of course you didn't, but she'll tell you all about it.

Pope Francis and Kim Davis Meet, Discuss Bigotry and Baking Recipes

What happens when Pope Francis and Kim Davis meet? Bigotry collaborations and baking recipe swapping, of course.

House Republicans Start ‘Pre-Impeachment’ Proceedings For Hillary Clinton

The Benghazi hearings were good, but some members of the House want to impeach Hillary Clinton preemptively, prior to the election.

Donald Trump Is Racking Up The D-Bag Endorsements

From Tom Brady to Willie Robertsons, the douchebags are lining up to endorse Donald Trump.