Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Engineers Prepare to Power Down Marco-D2

Republican android Marco Rubio is in his power down sequence.

Billionaire Pats Money Pile Gently, Reading Super Tuesday Results

Super Tuesday's results gave one billionaire reason to cheer.

Republican Voter Rethinking Trump Support ‘Since He Don’t Even Know Who the Klan Is’

This guy isn't sure he should vote for Trump if he doesn't know who the KKK is.

Trump: I’ve Never Heard of Hitler and Need to Research the Holocaust Before I Judge It

Donald Trump isn't sure if he's heard of the most notorious maniac in history.

Marco Rubio Seen in Comedy Cellar, Woodshedding New Trump Material

Marco Rubio tries on the yuks to get the votes.

Trump Campaign To Use Flaming T’s In November To Help Alabama Voters Find Polls

Donald Trump's installing unique makers to help guide his supporters to the polls.

Cruz, Rubio Both Claim to Have Finally ‘Out-Asshole’d Trump in Latest Debate

Marco Rubio and Ted Cruz argue over who was a bigger a-hole than Donald Trump in the last debate.

Obama’s Gun Confiscation Count: Week #369

Obama's Gun Confiscation rattles on and on and on...

World’s Irony Supply Threatened as Mitt Romney Comments on Someone Else’s Tax Returns

Mitt Romney's comments on Trump's tax returns could have lasting, devastating impacts on the planet.