Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Daily American Greatness Tracker – Day 6

Each day gives us another chance to accurately track just how much American Greatness there is in the good ol' U.S. of A.

Screeching, Racist Broom Handle In A Blonde Wig To Fill In For Vacationing Tammy Lahren

Right-wing pundit Tammy Lahren is taking a much-needed vacation, and her network has found the absolute perfect analogue for her while she's gone.

President Trump Signs Executive Order Declaring Himself Winner Of 2016 Popular Vote

With his newest executive order, President Donald J. Trump hopes to permanently remind people he won the popular vote last year.

Daily American Greatness Tracker – Day 5

Each day gives us another chance to accurately track just how much American Greatness there is in the good ol' U.S. of A.

Local Confederate Flag Defender Really Tired Of ‘Libtards Not Accepting’ President Trump

Clem O'Connell loves his confederate flag, and he's very angry that liberals haven't accepted President Trump's election yet.

Trump Wants Voter Fraud Investigation Because Even He Doesn’t Believe So Many People Were Dumb Enough To Vote For Him

President Donald Trump wants a "major investigation" into whether or not there was widespread voter fraud committed in last year's election.

Daily American Greatness Tracker – Day 4

Each day gives us another chance to accurately track just how much American Greatness there is in the good ol' U.S. of A.

Trump Hires Dr. Jenny McCarthy As White House Special Counsel On Alternative Facts

When it comes to administering alternative facts, perhaps no one alive today is as convincing as Dr. Jenny McCarthy, now on Team Trump.

President Trump Declares The White House A Safe Space From Criticism or Harsh Words

Cut Trump a break! You can't expect a president to do his job if every day he's in the White House he has to hear criticism do you?

Daily American Greatness Tracker – Day 3

We have cracked the formula for tabulating the daily shift in American greatness brought about by President Donald J. Trump.