Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Study Confirms Stephen Miller is an Ugly, Racist, Balding Cunt

A new study from the National Institute of Studying Really Obvious...

Trump Orders Additional “K” Added To Hanukkah to “Make Jew Christmas Great Again”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, in an Oval Office signing ceremony attended...

McConnell Promises to Hold Impeachment Trial in Moscow

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell said today that...

Tulsi Gabbard Votes “Present” on Bill Condemning Rectal Warts

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Future third party presidential candidate Rep. Tulsi Gabbard...

Trump and Obama Sign Treaty Officially Ending War on Christmas

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- He may be facing an uncertain political future,...

Know Nothing President Impeached by His “Do Nothing” Democrats

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A truly stupid, know nothing president was impeached...

Barack Obama and Merrick Garland Not Buying Mitch McConnell’s Bullshit

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Former President Barack Obama and Federal Judge Merrick...

Ken Starr and Newt Gingrich Issue Scathing Rebuke of ‘Brazen, Blowie-Free’ Impeachment of Donald Trump

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, President Donald J. Trump became the third...

Local White Supremacist Definitely Didn’t Mean to Use His Hand to Indicate “Everything is Okay”

BAISEUR DE COUSINS, LOUISIANA -- Local white white supremacist Chuck Palumbo...