Totally Bulls*it News

Oh Cool, I’m Blogging About Politics Again. Can Anyone Remember Why?

A long time ago, in a country that feels a million miles away now, I started this stupid little website because as I was...

Which Barnyard Animal Does Devin Nunes NOT Fuck?

Recently, Satirical Facts published a piece entitled "Can We Bait Goat Fucker Devin...

Pat Robertson Reminds Christians They’ll Go To Hell for Loving Baby Yoda and Baby Jesus

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has a stern warning...

Santa Asks 58 Year Old If She Still Believes Trump is a Real President

THE NORTH POLE, EARTH -- On Christmas night last year, President...

Trump Orders All Holiday Greetings Replaced With “Merry Christmas”

This morning, President Donald Trump issued an executive order that he...

Trump Demands House Vote on His Articles of Impeachment Using ‘Electoral College Rules’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump paced angrily around the White...

Study Shows Inverse Relationship Between Genital Size and How Often You Say “Cuck”

One of the nation's leading scientific research organizations has concluded that...

Study Shows 100% of Abortions None of Your Business

Several red states are in various stages of implementing sweeping abortion...

Trump Orders Facebook and Twitter to Force Users to Like and Follow Him

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's been no big secret around the nation's...

Alabama Pro-Lifers Grant Personhood to Precum

LAKE DORMIR AVEC LEURS COUSINS, ALABAMA -- Pro-life Republicans in the...

Women for Trump Teams With Chickens for McNuggets on Campaign Fundraiser

The White House will play host to a special dinner gala...