Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Online Petition Requesting CBC Cut Trump Out of “The White House” Reaches 150 Million Signatures

CANADA -- The Canadian Broadcasting Company edited out then-Citizen Donald Trump's...

Man Would Rather be Homeless in California Than Live in Alabama

LOS CONSERVATIVOS CHINGANDOS, CALIFORNIA -- This morning, a day after Christmas,...

Jesus Writes Op-Ed In Favor of Removing Trump From Office

Jesus Hubert Christ made headlines over the past weekend by writing...

McConnell: “Mulvaney Might Have TOO MUCH Evidence That Exonerates the President to Choose From”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The congressional stalemate over the delivery of President...

Study Confirms Stephen Miller is an Ugly, Racist, Balding Cunt

A new study from the National Institute of Studying Really Obvious...

Trump Orders Additional “K” Added To Hanukkah to “Make Jew Christmas Great Again”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, in an Oval Office signing ceremony attended...

McConnell Promises to Hold Impeachment Trial in Moscow

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell said today that...

Tulsi Gabbard Votes “Present” on Bill Condemning Rectal Warts

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Future third party presidential candidate Rep. Tulsi Gabbard...

Trump and Obama Sign Treaty Officially Ending War on Christmas

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- He may be facing an uncertain political future,...

Know Nothing President Impeached by His “Do Nothing” Democrats

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A truly stupid, know nothing president was impeached...