Totally Bulls*it News

Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity and politics don't mix." Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Project...

Crews Greasing Door Hinges In Case Trump Has to be Pushed Out of White House

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Whether he wants to leave or not, by...

Cruz Warns Democrats Might Try to Steal Future Elections With More Votes than Republicans

RIO PINCHE CULERO, TEXAS -- Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Trump's Taint) warned...

Trump Supporter Presents Mexico With Bill for “Billions of Miles of Trump’s Wall”

COLD CAVE HILLS TENNESSEE -- Right-wing podcaster and singer/songwriter Jethro Bohiggins...

Trump Administration Will Start Giving Biden Transition Team Covfefe Briefings

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Though he seems intent on never technically conceding...

Trump Still Hasn’t Said When Or If He’ll Return Rubio’s, Cruz’s, and Graham’s Balls

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Over the course of his first and only...

Eric and Don Jr Ask Santa for a PS5 and a New Election

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- The outgoing president's sons have sent...

Housekeeping Unsure How Long It Will Take to Fumigate Stench of Stupid from White House

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Perhaps its current occupant is still unwilling to...

Trump Grants Permission to John Barron to Concede to Joe Biden

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, almost three full weeks after losing his...

Despondent Sean Hannity Can’t Believe the Confederacy Is Without a President Again

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- There are millions of Trump supporters...

Can’t Follow Trump’s Legal Arguments? Try Smoking This Drug.

The 2020 presidential election was held almost three weeks ago, and...