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Marco Rubio

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...
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Trump Still Hasn’t Said When Or If He’ll Return Rubio’s, Cruz’s, and Graham’s Balls

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Over the course of his first and only presidential term, Donald...

Ghosts of Elijah Cummings and John Lewis Mistake Jar of Mayonnaise for Marco Rubio

THE GREAT BEYOND -- There was a brief but quite ironically hilarious case of...

Senate Votes to Lower the Law So It’s Just Beneath Trump

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- On a narrow, nearly party line vote, the U.S. Senate voted...

Rubio Says OJ Was Just Probably Just Kidding Around With His Knife

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- While out jogging around town, Senator Marco Rubio was spotted and...

Literally No One Volunteers To Help Ann Coulter Qualify For Childcare Tax Credit

"The kinds of creatures offering to willingly mate with Coulter are who you'd imagine at a Klan rally butt fucking each other's cousins while they watch Mississippi Burning and root for the cover-up."

GOP ‘Stoked’ Civil Debate Let Viewers See How Disgusting Their Ideas and Not Their Candidates Are

The latest GOP debate gave Republican a chance to showcase how terrible their ideas, and not just their candidates, are.

Marco Rubio Stops by WalMart on the Way Home for Job Application

Marco Rubio is going to need a new job after this November.

President Trump’s Itinerary Ruined as He Struggles for Hours to Thread a Needle

Trump has real issues manipulating objects.

Republican Voter ‘Majorly Turned Off’ by Lack of Genital Talk, Booger Eating in Dem Debate

One Republican voter tells us why the lack of genital talk in the Dem Debate made it a total borefest.

POLL: Majority Relieved to Find Out Future President’s Dong is Okay

Donald Trump thankfully cleared up any misconceptions about his penis in the last GOP debate.

Engineers Prepare to Power Down Marco-D2

Republican android Marco Rubio is in his power down sequence.

Marco Rubio Seen in Comedy Cellar, Woodshedding New Trump Material

Marco Rubio tries on the yuks to get the votes.

Latest articles

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...

Because of DEI, My Black Friends Don’t Like My Confederate Flag Collection No More

The following editorial was written by right-wing podcaster and singer/songwriter Jethro Q. Bohiggins. The...

The Easter Bunny Plans to Give Plan-B and Contraceptives to Red State Teenagers

"Did you know there have already been thousands of rape pregnancies as a result...