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Trump Will Hold Instagram Live Cross Burning to ‘Make Up For’ Canceled Campaign Rallies
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump reportedly has been quite unnerved at how long it's been since his last campaign rally. Mr. Trump has...
President Trump Asks All Intelligence Briefings Include Small Words And Big Pictures
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Trump administration has submitted an official request to Congress, asking that that the president have his daily intelligence briefings modified....
Vatican Unveils Papal Vape-als Line of Holy THC Products
THE VATICAN -- Since ascending to the Catholic Church's highest and most important post, Pope Francis has often times taken actions that past popes...
Stephen Miller and His New Bride Enjoying a Lovely Honeymoon Touring Dachau
DACHAU, GERMANY -- Over the weekend, White House Senior Racism Adviser Stephen Miller got married to Vice President Reverend Mike Pence's press secretary, and...
Incel Warns Left Hand Not to Expect Gifts Because Valentine’s Day Is a ‘Stupid...
LAKE NOHSECKS, FLORIDA-- Charles "Chuck" Charleston is a 24 year old self-described "incel." This means that Chuck is involuntarily celibate. Like nearly all incels,...
WDC Launching ‘Disney-‘ Streaming Service for Customers With Trump Level IQs
HOLLYWOO, CALIFORNIA -- At this point, a couple of months since its launch, the streaming service Disney+ simply must be considered a rousing success....
Disney Sues to Shut Down Production and Sale of “Baby Dildoda”
ANASLIME, CALIFORNIA -- The Walt Disney Company filed paperwork in court today seeking an injunction against an adult toy manufacturer that would force them...
Tomi Lahren Spotted In Recruitment Office Enlisting Someone Else’s Kids to Die for Trump’s...
VALLE DE CHINGANDA IDIOTA RUBIA, CALIFORNIA -- Fox News contributing racist and jingoism expert Tammy Larue was spotted at her local army recruitment office...
Collins: “Unlike Benghazi, Obama’s Birth Certificate, and The Tan Suit, This Impeachment Is Purely...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Rep. Doug Collins (R-Trump's Rectal Cavity) told reporters on the Hill today that in his view House Democrats are impeaching President...
Santa Asks Trump If He Can Bring Gifts to All The Good Little Boys...
NORTH POLE, EARTH -- The San-T-Claus Corporation, a corporate entity responsible for the funding and infrastructure used by Kristopher Kringle -- also known as...
