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Rip Van Winkle Worries Chuck Grassley Too Young and Inexperienced for Eighth Term
This morning, the living carbon fossil Chuck Grassley announced that he would be running for his eighth term in the U.S. Senate, representing the...
Dead Heat in “Dumbest Donald Trump in the World” Competition
FARTS-A LOT-GO, FLORIDUH -- An annual competition to find the world's dumbest man named "Donald Trump" is a statistical tie at this point. Each...
Taliban Try to Lure Women Away From Texas With Less Restrictive Laws
KABUL, AFGHANISTAN -- The Taliban are a far-right, deeply religiously fanatical group of people willing to use the threat of violence to cow their...
Greene’s Vet Begs Her Not to Take COVID Vaccine for Heartworms
EQUINE HILLS, GEORGIA -- Freshman Congresshorse Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) was forced to see her longtime doctor this weekend, after reporting symptoms of heartworms....
Liar Makes Truly Idiotic Claim About Crises During Crybaby Sore Loser’s Presidency
NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Appearing on Fox News today, known liar and moron Kayleigh McEnany, former Press Secretary to Donald John Trump, doubled-down...
CDC Updates Guidance on Covering Your Face With Trump’s Ass to Avoid COVID-19
ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- Last year, at one point the Centers for Disease Control believed that in addition to social distancing, washing your hands, and...
Palm Beach Burger King Cook ‘Wouldn’t Bet’ on Trump Winning in 2024
PALM BEACH, FLORIDUH -- Juan Miguel Vincente, 32, has been working at the Burger King franchise just down the street from his home for...
Texas Board of Education Eliminates Need to Teach Kids The South Lost
AUSTIN, TEXAS -- The Texas Board of Education, in a narrow, party line vote, has eliminated teaching history students who won the Civil War...
AZ GOP Will Have the Tooth Fairy Hand Deliver Election Fraud Evidence to Supreme...
FREEDICKS, ARIZONA -- The Arizona Republican Party's alleged audit of the 2020 election isn't complete yet, but that hasn't stopped them from parading the...
Neo-Nazi in a MAGA Hat Agrees With Andy Ngo: Antifa Are the Real Fascists
"You know what real fascism is, libtards? I'll tell you what real fascism is," William Riccardolldildo told his podcast audience recently. "It's being against...
