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The Donald’s Campaign Unveils New MAGA Hoods
Have you seen the newest Trump hat?
Poll Shows Majority of Americans Wouldn’t Mind if Coronavirus Outbreak Contained Only to Oval...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A new poll just released shows that a majority of Americans wouldn't mind it in the slightest if a coronavirus outbreak...
Mike Pence Orders CDC to Quadruple Thought and Prayer Capacity to Combat Coronavirus
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- As his first official act in the capacity of overseeing the country's response to a potential coronavirus update, Vice President High...
‘This country will never elect a socialist!’ – Woman Who Said No Black Man...
GLEN SPRINGS, CONNECTICUT -- Susan Haroldson is a 64-year-old mother of three and grandmother of seven.
She is a lifelong, proud liberal progressive, and according...
Mike Pence Listening to Low-Volume Porn on Headphones But Tells Mother It’s ASMR
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- He doesn't like to do it; in fact, he loathes it every time he has to. That doesn't change the fact...
Incoming Disney CEO Reaffirms Company’s Committment to Executive Bonuses and Homeless Park Employees
ANASLIME, CALIFORNIA -- Today, Disney announced that Bob Iger would be stepping down as their CEO and a longtime veteran of their corporation, Bob...
Sotomayor and Ginsburg Suggest Trump Should Recuse Himself From All Cases Involving America
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Throughout his presidency, President Donald Trump has tried to maintain an air of civility, comity, and bipartisan teamwork among all three...
Jesus: “It’s Cute When Christians Think Bernie’s Too Socialist”
KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- This morning during a heavenly press conference, Jesus Hubert "Son of God" Christ says his cell phone has been...
Man’s Dick Suing Him For Power of Attorney
VALLE CHORIZO, CALIFORNIA -- A landmark case is working itself through the California court system, and depending on its result, could have deep, penetrating...
President Trump Asks All Intelligence Briefings Include Small Words And Big Pictures
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Trump administration has submitted an official request to Congress, asking that that the president have his daily intelligence briefings modified....
