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Bill Barr Issues Summation of Summary of Ukraine Transcript
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Attorney General of the United States has issued a formal summation of the summary of the transcript of a call...
Obama Offers to Print Articles of Impeachment on His Long Form Birth Certificate
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Former President Barack H. Obama (D-Kenya) has reached out to Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi and offered to let her...
White House Transcript of Ukraine Call Leaks
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The President of the United States, President Donald J. Trump, seems to be headed toward a date with either history or...
Mouth Breathing, Knuckle Dragging Moron Mocks Girl Ten Times Smarter and Accomplished Than He’ll...
COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- Right-wing podcaster and singer/writer Jethro Bohiggins defended President Trump today from criticisms that he was unpresidential by mocking or...
NRA Supports Universal Background Checks and Waiting Periods For Vaping Products
FAIRFAX, VIRGINIA -- During a press conference this morning, a spokesterrorist for the National Rifle Association announced that the NRA officially backs the Trump...
“I Guess I’ll Just Have to Bomb Iran All By Myself!”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A visibly upset John Bolton was seen angrily leaving the White House this morning, having tendered his resignation at the request...
Taliban Spokesman Says They Weren’t Sure They Wanted to Hang Out With a ‘Religious...
AFGHANISTAN -- A spokesterrorist for the Taliban announced today that his employers are "just fine and dandy" with President Trump calling off planned talked...
Huckabee Sanders Announces Book Title on First Fox News Appearance Since Leaving White House
HOG MOUNTAIN, ARKANSAS -- Former White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders appeared on Fox News this morning. It was her first such appearance...
Tucker Carlson’s Dry Cleaner Won’t Return White Sheets Without Claim Ticket
REICH LAKE, CALIFORNIA -- Fox News host Tucker Carlson is reportedly still fuming mad about an incident that took place earlier in the week...
DeVos To Strike More Than 4.5 Billion Years Of Earth’s History From School Curriculum
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Education Secretary Betsy DeVos announced today that soon schools all across America will have drastically revised history texts for all school...
