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Through Tears of Joy, Lung Cancer Tells Radio Audience Its Stage 4 Limbaugh Infection...
CHINGADERO GORDO, FLORIDA -- Fighting through tears of joy, Lung Cancer told its radio audience today that it was "pleased and excited" to announce...
Report: Coronavirus Devastated, Despondent, and Suicidal
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Donald Trump has promised the American people several times in the last eight months he would defeat the coronavirus. Now, hours...
Why Won’t Joe Biden Agree to a Full Body Cavity Search Before Tonight’s Debate?
What's Joe Biden hiding? Why won't he acquiesce to any of Dear President's demands about the first debate between the two tonight? First, Biden...
Lindsey Graham Offering ‘Handies and Half-and-Halfs’ to Campaign Donors
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senator Lindsey Graham (R-Trump's Taint) has not been coy or reticent about describing the dire situation his re-election campaign is in....
Well That’s It. The Republicans Have Convinced Me. I am NOT Voting for Hunter...
Editor's Note:
The following is an editorial written by the Editor In Chief and Head Fuckwit of The Political Garbage Chute, James "Jambo" Schlarmann. The views and...
Pussy Grabbing Predator With 25 Credible Allegations of Sexual Assault Can’t Wait to Bring...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In the nation's capital, there is a 74-year-old pussy grabbing alleged billionaire that has, over his lifetime, collected 25 credible allegations...
Newly Discovered Life on Venus Declines Offer to Be Taken to Our Leader
BLEEPBLORP, VENUS -- 2020 has been quite a year. "One for the record books," as one might be inclined to say. An impeachment trial....
Man Who Intentionally Wiped Out 200k Americans Outraged Mueller’s Agents Accidentally Wiped Their Phones
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- If there's one thing we know about Trump supporters, it's that part of their core values is the belief that no...
Smoky-Eyed Lying Fuckstick Defends Former Lying Fuckstick Boss in Two ABC Interviews
FUGLY HEIGHTS, ARKANSAS -- In under 70 days, the general public will have their first chance to choose who will lead the country in...
Ivanka: “If Anyone is Stroking Daddy, I Would Know About It!”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Why was President Donald J. Trump rushed to Walter Reed Memorial Hospital in November of 2019? The White House has tried...
