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MENSA Finds “Genius” Donald Trump’s Membership Card
ARLINGTON, TEXAS -- The executive team of American MENSA, a long-running organization whose membership is comprised of geniuses, has released a statement following a...
Trump Has “Fire and Fury” Transcribed Into Pictures So He Can Understand Which Parts...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Despite heavy pressure from his bully pulpit, President Donald Trump was unable to successfully halt the publication of Michael Wolff's explosive...
Trump Orders White House Crew to Downsize Big Red Button For His Fingers
Engineers are busy in the White House downsizing the big red button that presidents use to launch nuclear strikes to something for suited to Trump.
Local Holocaust Denier Outraged To Find Out Trump’s A Climate Denier Too
MINE CAMP, WEST VIRGINIA -- Chad Skeeter is a 37 year old white nationalist who believes that the liberal Democrat agenda includes a systematic...
Putin Dictates Trump’s New Year’s Resolutions To Him
MOSCOW, RUSSIA -- Today, Russian President Vladimir Putin made a phone call to Secondary American President Donald Trump and dictated a list of resolutions...
On 16th Tee, Trump Unveils New National Security Strategy Of “Ooga Booga Muslims!”
MAR-A-LAGO -- Not wanting to be accused of vacationing too much during his first year, President Trump paused shortly before taking his tee shot...
Trump Declares South Electoral College Winners Of Civil War
MAR-A-LAGO, FLORIDA -- Just hours after triumphantly declaring a victory in the War on Christmas, President Donald Trump gave a late Christmas gift to...
General Trump Declares Victory In The War On Christmas
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A strident and victorious General Donald Trump -- President of The United States of America -- triumphantly burst onto the front...
Donald Trump Jr. To Have Breakthrough Plastic Surgery For His ‘Chronic Jizz Face’
NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- The president's son will be undergoing a radical, experimental new plastic surgery procedure, and the hope is that when...
Disappointed Eric Trump Told SpaceX Launch Was Not Actually Santa’s Sleigh
NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- The president's second son had to be let down gently this morning by his wife, children, and dogs. All...
