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Report: More People Watched Aretha Franklin’s Funeral Than Trump’s Inauguration
GRAND FALLS, MICHIGAN -- Mathematicians at the University of Northern Michigan have released the results of a snap study they did which seems to...
Secret Service Wants to Question McCain Eulogists For Slaying Trump
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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- At this hour, the Secret Service is confirming that they will be reaching out to former Presidents...
To Defeat Them, Trump Decides To Buy Google
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Though White House lawyers are still confirming if it would be legal to do so, President Donald Trump announced today that...
Putin Growing Irritated Hillary Is In Trump’s Mouth More Than He Is These Days
MOSCOW, RUSSIA -- Russian/American President Vladimir Putin (R-Kremlin) is said to be extremely irate these days, after reviewing several recent tweets sent by one...
Huckabee Sanders Can’t Guarantee Trump’s Not Never Probably Absolutely Definitely Said The N-Word...
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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders told reporters today that she "cannot, in good faith, guarantee"...
Sarah Huckabee Sanders Says Trump’s So Honest It Just Really, Really, Really Feels Like...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The subject of whether or not President Donald Trump can be trusted is, of course, a silly one. The man who...
Mexican American Has Surprisingly Little Problem Believing Trump Has Used The N-Word Before
LOS CHINGADEROS NARANJOS, CALIFORNIA -- Whether or not the sitting President of the United States is on record as having used one of the...
Obama Can’t Guarantee He Never Heard N-Word
SECRET SHARIA BUNKER, SOMEWHERE IN KENYA -- Deep within his specially designed Sharia Bunker, former President Barack Hussein Obama (D-Kenya) issued a statement regarding...
Trump Says Mexico Will Pay For His Wall By Funding His New Space Force
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- While there has been much buzz and speculation about the Trump administration's proposed Space Force, what no one on the Hill...
Putin Wants to Compare Tapes With Omarosa
MOSCOW, RUSSIA -- There is at least one person who runs the United States of America who is not all that upset with Omarosa...
