Totally Bulls*it News

Greenlander Would Rather Not Lose Universal Healthcare to Join “Shit Hole” Country

"Why would we want to join a shit hole country that doesn't even give us basic human health services like every other developed nation?" When...

Area White Guy Sure He Knows How Black People Should Protest

One man thinks he can tell the Black Lives Matter activists the best way to get results: do nothing.

Congressional Republicans Hastily Trying to Repeal Donald Trump

Can Boehner and McConnell successfully repeal Donald Trump?

Congressional Republicans Hold Mass Citizenship Ceremony for ‘Fetal Americans’

The furor over highly-edited Planned Parenthood videos has spilled into Congress.

5 “Highlights” From the New AP U.S. History Test

Here are five new additions to the AP U.S. History test that will make any parent excited to send their kids to school.

Joe Biden Offers to Just Move His Chair Over to the Oval Office Next November

He'd leave the bean bag chairs in his old office though.

EXCLUSIVE! We Talk to a 2-Month Old Fetus About Its Feelings on Abortion!

We went right to the source to find some new perspective on abortion.

Fox News Announces ‘B-Team’ Debate, Moderated by Inanimate Rock

Fox News has announced plans for a second, B-team debate of Republican contenders.

Obama Gun Confiscation Count: Week #418

The Obama Gun Confiscation just keeps rollin' along.

Ruined Traditional Marriage Count (Week #5)

Did gay marriage ruin your straight marriage this week too?!