Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Good Cop Will Speak Up Once He’s Witnessed His 15th Unlawful Killing

One Illinois cop has had it up to here with police brutality, and if he sees just a little more of it, he'll probably do something.

Mexican Immigrant Feeling Left Out After GOP’s Hate-Pivot to Muslims

The story of one Mexican immigrant's sadness at being ignored in their rhetoric by Republicans over their Islamaphobia.

GOP Strategist: Republican Candidates Need ‘Right Mix of Phobias’ to Win Primary Voters

One GOP strategist's take on how someone can win his party's nomination.

4 Year Old Syrian Refugee: ISIS Tried to Recruit Me With Candy, Nick Jr. Shows

One young Syrian Refugee tells the press about being recruited by ISIS/Daesh.

Trump Surrogate: Let’s Put the Refugees in Our FEMA Camps!

One Republican is defending another who suggested rounding up Syrian refugees. Where have we heard that before?

Jeb!: We Can Defeat ISIS With ‘The Bush Family Secret Recipe for Middle East Success’

Jeb Bush talked about how he'd beat ISIS, and gave some specifics to his plan.

Marco Rubio: Syrian Refugees Can Wear Special Patches to ‘Help Spot Them in a Crowd Better’

Does Marco Rubio think asking Syrian refugees to wear special patches will help national security?

NRA Exec: Terror Suspects Have Second Amendment Rights Too!

One NRA executive explains why it's a good thing that terrorists can pass the FBI Background check.

Ted Cruz Unsure If He Should Attack Mexican Immigrants or Syrian Refugees More

Ted Cruz is debating whether to stoke more fear over immigrants or refugees.

‘A Kindler, Gentler Sharia’: John Kasich Explains His Proposed Department of Christianity

John Kasich explains why his idea of creating a Department of Jesus isn't a violation of the first principle of the Bill of Rights.