Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Hillary Clinton Quickly Walks Back Praise for Dubya’s Response to Katrina

Hillary Clinton has to apologize for another WTF-style comment.

GOP ‘Stoked’ Civil Debate Let Viewers See How Disgusting Their Ideas and Not Their Candidates Are

The latest GOP debate gave Republican a chance to showcase how terrible their ideas, and not just their candidates, are.

Obama’s Gun Confiscation Count: Week #371

Did Obama's Gun Confiscation ensnare your freedom cannon?

Ted Cruz to GOP Voters: ‘Think of me as the lesser of two diarrheas’

Ted Cruz knows he's not the most loved, but he wants to be the second-most hated.

Proud Gun Owner Mom in Tense Mexican Standoff With 3rd Grader

A woman and her young child are in a Mexican Standoff over snack time.

Marco Rubio Stops by WalMart on the Way Home for Job Application

Marco Rubio is going to need a new job after this November.

Woman Who Was in Elementary School in the 60’s: Bernie Sanders’ Civil Rights Arrest ‘No Big Deal’

One Hillary supporter thinks Bernie Sanders being arrested as part of a civil rights protest is a big "whatever."

Reince Priebus Interviewing Primates to Fornicate With Footballs In Lieu of More Primary Debates

GOP chairman Reince Priebus has a new idea to distract voters from how terrible his party has become.