Totally Bulls*it News

Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity and politics don't mix." Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Project...

Trump Supporter Glad to Have The President ‘Tweeting Crazy Shit from Home’ Again

Donald Trump is back home from his long trip abroad, and this supporter of his is just glad the crazy tweets are coming from Washington once more.

Trump Says U.S. Didn’t Need Paris Accords Because NASA Found Planet Covfefe & We’ll Live There

Who needs Earth when you can trade it up for a newer, hotter planet? That's Trump's philosophy and why he ditched the Paris Accords.

Man Who Probably Won’t Be Alive in 20 Years Super Glad Trump Just Fucked Over the Planet

By dropping out of the Paris Accords, Donald Trump has imperiled the planet, but that doesn't matter to this old dude.

Trump Was ‘Not Sure’ If He Should Try To Save The Planet He Thinks Revolves Around Him

Before making his important, landmark decision on the Paris Climate Accords, President Trump had some soul searching to do.

Spicer Cancels Press Briefings, Will Shout Talking Points From Inside Oval Office Instead

Sean Spicer and the White House have decided that on-camera press briefings are too challenging, and will just shout talking points from the Oval Office.

Guy Who Put Out “Pray 4 Assassin” Obama Dummy Outraged by Kathy Griffin Trump Beheading

One Obama hating man is really disgusted by Kathy Griffin doing something he wishes he had the guts to have done with Obama.

Kellyanne Conway: Bowling Green Attackers Were Covfefe Immigrants

White House adviser Kellyanne Conway spins a new explanation for a baffling tweet about "Covfefe" from her boss, the Commander in Chief.

Merkel Offers to Comfort and Counsel Americans Dealing With Their ‘Angry, Fascist Despot’

German Chancellor Angela Merkel has made a rather surprising, historic, and compassionate offer to Trump-resistant Americans.

White House Doctors Fear Trump May Never Wear Kids’ Mittens Again After Macron Handshake

A rough handshake from the French president Emanuel Macron may have left President Trump's hands in a state of irreparable harm.

Birther and 9/11 Truther Dubious About ‘Fake News’ of Russia/Trump Collusion

If there was any collusion between Russia and the Trump campaign, this right-wing podcaster just doesn't see it. So stop trying, libtards.