Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Weed Declared “Pretty Cool” By Association of Music and Food Fans

The Association of Music and Food Fans, a consortium of people...

Donald Jr. and Eric Trump Plan to Scare White House Trick-or-Treaters as ‘Pointy-Headed Ghosts’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning the Trump administration announced that First...

Bob Corker Says He’s ‘Not a Fan of the Taste of Trump’s Dick’ Anymore

"It's no fun sucking someone's dick, if you're just going to get sucker punched while it's still in your mouth."