Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Comet Pizza Unveils New Roy Moore Signature Pie: 14 Year Old Meat On Old Dried Up Cracker

Comet Ping Pong -- a pizza restaurant in the Washington, D.C....

Conservative Podcaster: “I Saw Roy Moore Hit On A 14 Year Old At A Football Game But At Least He Stood For The Anthem!”

"You gotta ask yourself what's more disgusting -- pedophiles, or unpatriotic pedophiles?"

GOP Congressman Demands Investigation Into Link Between Roy Moore And Benghazi

"Seriously, why the hell does Hillary Clinton skate on this?"

Trump Wants His Bone Spurs Added To Vietnam War Memorial

"If we can't add them to the memorial, can I give them a presidential medal of freedom or some shit?"

American Christian Refuses To Put Quarter In Homeless Man’s Starbucks “Holiday” Cup

"If he wants Christian charity from me, he has to give me a Christian vessel to put it in."

Local Mouth Breathing Podcaster Super Happy With Trump’s “Short and Fat” Kim Jong-Un Tweet

"As long as there's a libtard somewhere getting upset by it, I don't care if he nukes California and takes a dump on the Lincoln Memorial's steps."

Roy Moore: “My Family Values Are Valuing The Young Girls In Your Family”

"Wedding teenagers is exactly the kind of Biblical marriage I've been defending for decades."

Trump Set To Tap Putin As New Special Prosecutor In Russia Investigation

AIR FORCE ONE — Time to relax after two days of...

Man Sees Image of Jesus in 7-Eleven Holiday Cup

"If Starbucks is going to get involved on the wrong side of the War on Christmas, then so be it."

Taliban Cleric Doesn’t See Anything Wrong With Roy Moore’s Behavior

"We keep trying to tell American Christians we have more in common with them than not."