Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

GOP Rep: “We Need Two Separate FBIs For Democrats and Republicans”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A freshman Republican congressman has floated a rather...

Trumper Buys $45,000 Worth In Nike Socks To Burn In Boycott

HOBART, ARKANSAS -- Right-wing podcaster and YouTube star Clem O'Connell told...

Robertson Begs ‘The Gays’ to Only Do ‘Hand and Mouth Stuff’ Until After Hurricane Season

Televangelist and 700 Club host Pat Robertson has an interesting proposal for the LGBTQ community that he hopes will stop the hurricanes.

Ted Cruz Grills Kavanaugh For His Views On Booger Eating

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Senate Judiciary Committee has been interviewing Judge...

Report: More People Watched Aretha Franklin’s Funeral Than Trump’s Inauguration

GRAND FALLS, MICHIGAN -- Mathematicians at the University of Northern Michigan...

Secret Service Wants to Question McCain Eulogists For Slaying Trump

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); WASHINGTON, D.C. -- At this hour, the...

San Diego Man Will F**king Fight You If You Say Your Town Has Better Tacos Than His

SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA -- 38 year old San Diego native Lance...

To Defeat Them, Trump Decides To Buy Google

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Though White House lawyers are still confirming if...

Fans and Friends Wonder If Louis CK Forced His Comeback on Everyone Too Soon

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Comedy and sexual misconduct icon Louis...