Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Kavanaugh Issues Apology For Habitually, Repeatedly, Incessantly Missing Signals He Should Pull Out

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh is under intense,...

Trump Demands Accusers Confirm If Kavanaugh’s Genitals Look Like Any Video Game Characters

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump issued a formal presidential decree,...

Trump Wonders If Kavanaugh Accusers ‘Maybe Let’ Themselves Be Assaulted ‘For Totally Political Reasons’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This weekend, another bombshell allegation of sexual misconduct...

IBM Donating $5 Million to Holocaust Museum

Washington, D.C. -- International Business Machines (IBM) announced on Friday that...

OJ Simpson Furnishes Media With Letter Signed By 65 Women He Didn’t Murder

MATADOR, NEVADA -- Former NFL star OJ Simpson held a press...

Poll: Majority of Americans Think Trump is “The Worst, From the Standpoint of Being President”

A poll released Tuesday seems to indicate that the majority of...

Ivanka Trump Refutes Key Details Of Stormy Daniels Tell-All

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Adult film star Stormy Daniels made enormous waves...

Kavanaugh Accuser Christine Blasey Ford Opens Separate Bank Account For All That Sweet Death Threat Cash

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Christine Blasey Ford, the woman who is accusing Supreme...

Mueller Pledges To Catch More Witches And Fewer Trump Associates From Now On

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Special Counsel Robert Mueller has issued a statement...

Radioactive Material Discovered During Annual River Cleanup

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); Nevada City, CA -- A group of...