Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

President Acknowledges He Had to Buy His Sons’ Way Into Trump University

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This week, America was rocked by a scandal...

Trump Nominates Li “Cindy” Yang as New Secretary of Hand Labor

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump has announced a new cabinet...

Israeli Jew Making Sure She Can Criticize Her Government Without Being Called Antisemite

JERUSALEM, ISRAEL -- Deborah Fineman has been a dual citizen of...

Tucker Carlson Offered Back-up Gig With Trump Administration

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- New audio of Fox News host Tucker Carlson's...

Trump Regrets Lying About Lying About Telling Michael Cohen to Lie

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When Donald Trump came down from the White...

David Avocado Wolfe Clinging to Life After Accidental Crystal Chakra Overdose

AURA CITY, WOOSCONSIN -- Local authorities and doctors are confirming at...

President Trump Says He Regrets Every Abortion He Paid For, and the Don Jr. He Didn’t

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last weekend, President Donald Trump spoke at CPAC...

One Trump Autographed Bible Already Sold on eBay for $666

CORNPONE, ALABAMA -- A man who was at an evangelical church...

Trump Asked Woman If The Bible He Signed is ‘Any Good or Not’

FT. CONFEDERATE, ALABAMA -- Yesterday, President Donald Trump visited the State...