Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Trump Offers to Send Rakes and Paper Towels to Australia In Exchange for Its Electoral College Votes

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump sent the Prime Minister of...

Donald Trump Lists ‘F_ _king Your Mom’ as Only New Year’s Resolution

Donald Trump has a very short, not so sweet list of New Year's resolutions.

He Would Rather Be Homeless in California Than Live in Alabama

LOS CONSERVATIVOS CHINGANDOS, CALIFORNIA -- This morning, a day after Christmas,...

Study Confirms 100% of Abortions Still None of Your Fucking Business

Several red states are in various stages of implementing sweeping abortion...

Study Confirms Stephen Miller is an Ugly, Racist, Balding C_ _t

A new study from the National Institute of Studying Really Obvious...

Online Petition Requesting CBC Cut Trump Out of “The White House” Reaches 150 Million Signatures

CANADA -- The Canadian Broadcasting Company edited out then-Citizen Donald Trump's...

Man Would Rather be Homeless in California Than Live in Alabama

LOS CONSERVATIVOS CHINGANDOS, CALIFORNIA -- This morning, a day after Christmas,...

Jesus Writes Op-Ed In Favor of Removing Trump From Office

Jesus Hubert Christ made headlines over the past weekend by writing...

McConnell: “Mulvaney Might Have TOO MUCH Evidence That Exonerates the President to Choose From”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The congressional stalemate over the delivery of President...