Totally Bulls*it News

I Tried the New McMoron Combo Meal. 0/10

By no means would I call myself a "gourmet." Maybe a "gourmand," but I'm not really even sure about that. Whatever the label you...

White House Wants Bill Outlawing Abortion After Point Of Erection

WASHINGTON, D.C. --  At a prayer breakfast in the nation's capital...

Coronavirus Nominated for Best Virus In a Best Actor in a Lead Role

HOLLYWOO, CALIFORNIA -- The novel coronavirus woke up to perhaps the...

Trump Asks Joint Chiefs If U.S. Can ‘Nuke Coronavirus Like a Hurricane’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Projecting an air of confidence and competence has...

Petition to Put Harvey Weinstein In Epstein’s Prison Cell Reaches Six Million Signatures

NEW YORK -- This week, a petition to put disgraced Hollywood...

Trump Boys All Set To Go Bear Hunting on Trip to New York Stock Exchange

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- "We're goin' on a bear hunt,...

12 Pictures of Kittens So Cute You’ll Want to Punch a Nun

Around this office, we're big fans of cute little kittens. You...

DNC Says Next Presidential Debate Will Be Bare Chested Brawl Between Biden and Sanders

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Democratic National Committee has decided that the...

Trump Now Requires Everyone to Get Coronavirus Test Before Kissing His Ass

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump has instituted a new White...

CDC Recommends Americans Quarantine Themselves From President Trump

WASHINGTON, D.C. --  The Centers for Disease Control issued new guidance...