Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Texas Woman Identifies as Tesla Dealership So Government Will Protect Her Rights

"...I just thought it might be cool if my government defended...

Trump Orders Every American to Buy Six Teslas

"I call THIS 'free market authoritarianism.'" There is simply no denying it,...

His Plastic Surgeon Told Me Elon’s Pronouns Are “Closet Case”

"...ol' Elon thinks and talks about transgender people's genitals more than...

Saying “Gulf of America” is How Pedophiles Are Identifying Each Other Now

"...I think my old friend Jeff Epstein would get a kick...

Eagles Accept Gavin Newsom’s Invitation to Visit California

"As much as we would have graciously eaten a cold Big...