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James Schlarmann

Comedian/Satirist/Amateur Burrito Wrangler
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Lifestyle

Nothing Says Understanding American Freedom Like Cheering for Teenagers to Get Beaten by Cops

"...one thing I have now learned is that fascism and freedom of speech are pretty much the same thing. I mean, if they weren't, wouldn't all the conservatives who were...raising alarms about the lack of free speech on college campuses be freaking out about...
Women's Rights

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I think a woman is programmed by God himself to be my willing sex and food preparation slave." If there's one thing we all know about abortion bans, it's that they keep...
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Conservative Media

Bill Maher is So Sick and Tired of Millennial Liberals He May Stop Trying to Fuck Them One Day

For the better part of four decades, there have been fewer American liberals more...
MAGA News

Literal Dumpster Fire Sues Marjorie Taylor Greene For Copyright Infringement

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Freshman Congresspony Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) is no stranger to a...
LGTBQ+

I’m in Florida. My Cousin’s in Tennessee. We’re Moving to TX to Protect Our Baby From Groomers.

The following editorial was submitted by Eddie Pesghetti, a 35 year old resident of...
Conservative Media

When Glenn Greenwald Can’t Sleep, He Lays in Bed and Counts Dead Ukrainians

There is only one real, authentic, actual journalist left in the world. Luckily for...
Science & Medicine

Darwin Awards Give Lifetime Achievement Recognition to Anti-Vaxxers Who Died of COVID

Each year, the Darwin Awards are handed to some of humanity's least best and...
Women's Rights

Texas Man Thinks Wife’s OB is a Groomer Because They Couldn’t Find the Fetus’s Genitals

FT. SHITLIP, TEXAS -- A man in the Lonestar State filed a suit in...
LGTBQ+

Stable Hands Confirm Marjorie Taylor Greene Has Always Been Anti-Grooming

Ever since Gov. Ron DeSantis's lizard faced press secretary defended Florida's controversial "Don't Say...
U.S. Politics

Putin Endorses Trump’s Endorsement of Dr. Oz

Last week, former President Donald Trump attempted to play kingmaker again, and waded into...
LGTBQ+

DeSantis is Right! I Was Groomed for The Soros Transgender Illegal Immigrant Army in School.

The following editorial was written and submitted to us by a Florida resident, who...
Women's Rights

Pregnant Democrat Still Undecided Whether to Murder or Groom Her Fetus

She has some time to decide, but not all that much time, and 28...
Lifestyle

We Have Our First Black Female Supreme Court Justice, But When Will It Be a White Man’s Turn?

The following editorial was submitted to this outlet by Dick Richardson, a conservative podcaster....
MAGA News

Report: Marjorie Taylor Greene Doesn’t Let Water Within 20 Feet of Her

Ever since she was sworn into office in January of 2021, freshman Congressmare Marjorie...
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Latest articles

Lifestyle

Nothing Says Understanding American Freedom Like Cheering for Teenagers to Get Beaten by Cops

"...one thing I have now learned is that fascism and freedom of speech are...
Women's Rights

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I...
Criminal Justice

I Have a Wish List of Things Dark Brandon Should Do With His Presidential Immunity

Some people might really think that if the Supreme Court says presidents have immunity...
Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)