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Mike Bloomberg

For Conservatives, Fart Naps Are Quickly Replacing Power Naps

"While some might casually observe the irony in someone who belittles his opponent as...

Surely, We Don’t Expect Republicans to Suck Their Cult Leader Off All The Way from D.C.?

"Does anyone know how hard it is to have a long-distance relationship, much less...
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Bloomberg Will Pay You $15,000 and a New Tesla to Tell People He Won The Debate

DESERT SPRINGS, NEVADA -- Last night, former New York City Mayor Mike Bloomberg made...

Bloomberg Will Pay You $10,000 to Stop Thinking He’s Trying to Buy The Presidency

LOST WAGES, NEVADA -- At a campaign stop ahead of the Nevada primary, former...

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For Conservatives, Fart Naps Are Quickly Replacing Power Naps

"While some might casually observe the irony in someone who belittles his opponent as...

Surely, We Don’t Expect Republicans to Suck Their Cult Leader Off All The Way from D.C.?

"Does anyone know how hard it is to have a long-distance relationship, much less...

A Firehose That Spews Diarrhea Told Me It’s Been Holding Mock Debates With Joe Biden

"...I'm not Harvey Keitel or Bobby DeNiro or anything, but I guess all that...

I Interviewed the Condom Donald Trump Didn’t Use When He Ivanka’d Stormy Daniels

"Prophylactic Americans have senses just like everyone else. And would YOU want to ever...