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David Avocado Wolfe

Criminal Justice

I Interviewed the Condom Donald Trump Didn’t Use When He Ivanka’d Stormy Daniels

"Prophylactic Americans have senses just like everyone else. And would YOU want to ever...
Criminal Justice

Who Hasn’t Told a Woman She Reminds Us of Our Child Right Before We Put Our Penis In Her?

"Turns out, most of us don't think about our kids before we fuck someone....
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Science & Medicine

Trump Appoints David Avocado Wolfe FDA High Wizard Chieftain of Raw Foods and Woo

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Though his cabinet has been fully confirmed, President Donald Trump isn't...
Science & Medicine

Trump Names David Avocado Wolfe Wind Cancer Czar

WASHINGTON. D.C. -- President Donald Trump recently attacked wind-based energy production in part because...
Science & Medicine

David Avocado Wolfe Clinging to Life After Accidental Crystal Chakra Overdose

AURA CITY, WOOSCONSIN -- Local authorities and doctors are confirming at this time that...
Science & Medicine

David “Avocado” Wolfe Named FDA High Wizard Chieftain Of Raw Foods And Woo

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump announced that he has created and filled a...
Science & Medicine

David Avocado Wolfe In Critical Condition After Apparent Accidental Crystal Chakra Voodoo Overdose

AURA CITY, WOOSCONSIN -- Local authorities and doctors are confirming at this time that...
Science & Medicine

Trump Appoints David “Avocado” Wolfe FDA High Wizard Chieftain of Raw Foods and Woo

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald Trump announced that he has directed the Food...
Science & Medicine

Trump Appoints David “Avocado” Wolfe FDA High Wizard Chieftain of Raw Foods and Woo

President Donald Trump has tapped nutritionist David Avocado Wolfe for a new and important role at the Food and Drug Administration.

Latest articles

Criminal Justice

I Interviewed the Condom Donald Trump Didn’t Use When He Ivanka’d Stormy Daniels

"Prophylactic Americans have senses just like everyone else. And would YOU want to ever...
Criminal Justice

Who Hasn’t Told a Woman She Reminds Us of Our Child Right Before We Put Our Penis In Her?

"Turns out, most of us don't think about our kids before we fuck someone....
Lifestyle

Nothing Says Understanding American Freedom Like Cheering for Teenagers to Get Beaten by Cops

"...one thing I have now learned is that fascism and freedom of speech are...
Women's Rights

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I...

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