POLL: Majority of Democrats Ready For Holding Their Nose and Voting For Hillary

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The results of a recent poll have shown that most voters who identify as Democrats are ready for Hillary — ready for holding their nose and voting for her, that is. The Political Garbage Chute and The Old Pine Polling Company teamed-up and surveyed 1,023 registered Democrats as to their thoughts and feelings about the 2016 presidential election, who they were supported in the election, and also their overall feelings about the predestined candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton announcing that she was indeed going to accept her role as the anointed Democratic candidate of 2016.

89% of respondents said that they were supporting Hillary Clinton in the upcoming cycle, not because she was their ideal, dream candidate, but because they were willing to “hold their nose and vote for” any candidate that wasn’t a Republican. The poll asked those who said they were supporting Hillary for the reasoning behind their support. 34% of those who said they are supporting Clinton are doing so because “Republicans are still the stupid party,” while 38% said they were supporting Mrs. Clinton because “Republicans are still the anti-science party” and another 19% said they supported Hillary because “Republicans are still the anti-equality, anti-immigrant, anti-anything not Puritanical and white party.”

If you support Hillary Clinton in 2016, why? %
Republicans are still the stupid party. 34%
Republicans are still the stupid party. 38%
Republicans are still the anti-equality, anti-immigrant, anti-anything not Puritanical and white party. 19%

Respondents asked if they were satisfied with Mrs. Clinton running unopposed, at least for the time being, and while 62% of those surveyed said they were hoping another candidate would have the guts to challenge Clinton, 78% of them said they were okay with Clinton being the one and only representative of so-called progressive policies because a “chimpanzee with a meth addiction would be better than a Republican” to them, while 15% said “Hitler and Pol Pot’s baby would be less scary” to them as the next president than a Republican.

If you support Hillary Clinton running unopposed in 2016, why? %
A chimpanzee with a meth addiction would be better than a Republican. 78%
Hitler and Pol Pot’s baby would be less scary to me than a Republican. 15%
I like muffins. 6%

During the phone polling, a small, three question section was administered wherein respondents could give their own responses, rather than choose from a list of answers. Melvin C., who is from Ridley’s Falls, New Hampshire said that he “believe[s] there are probably hundreds of far better candidates out there” that “don’t kowtow to Corporate America and the Military Industrial Complex” like Clinton will but that he “also understand[s] that voting for a Republican president is like voting for a segregationist oligarch back in the 1930’s,” so he and his fellow Dems will “just have to sleep well at night knowing we at least kept an even bigger asshole out of the White House than the one we put in there.”

“I know for a fact there dozens of people I’d rather have be our next president out there,” Gloria Q. from Paramount Peak, CA told our pollsters. “But,” Gloria continued, “I don’t want to rock the boat too much and demand more choices from one of the only two viable political parties in our country today. I mean, who am I to insist that instead of being essentially told who to vote for I get to actually choose between multiple people after those people were asked intelligent, relevant and cogent questions from a free press? I’m just an American voter, after all, not a rich lobbyist.”

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