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Robertson: God Probably Won’t Smite America With Hurricanes Over ‘Rimming And Outer-Play’

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VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Perhaps in an attempt to quell growing furor over comments he made, pleading with the LGBTQ community to limit their...

God: ‘Someone Tell Jeff Sessions To Stop Using Me To Justify Being an Evil,...

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KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- When Larry "God" Schumway strode to the podium in front of the famous pearly gates that adorn the entrance...

Economists: Legal California Marijuana Will Make In ‘N’ Out Richer Than God By 2028

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NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Economists at the National Institute of Cash Money released the results of a study they conducted during the first...

Woman Tends To Cuss A Lot When You Act Like A Goddamned Fucking Shitheaded...

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Megan Hofer, 35 years old and from Santa Chingada, California, admits that she has a "potty mouth." According to Megan, however, her tendency to...

Tomi Lahren Watched Trump’s Access Hollywood Tape Instead Of The ‘Godless Sexual Deviants’ On...

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VAPID TWUNT, TEXAS -- This morning, right-wing firebrand commentator and Fox News contributor Tabasco Lahren told Fox & Friends that she didn't watch the Oscars,...

God to Americans: “Your Kids Are Making It Here Faster Than Your Thoughts And...

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KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- This morning, Larry "God" Schumway held a press conference in front of the Pearly Gates, and when asked by...

Televangelist on Rob Porter Affair: ‘Sometimes God Gives Ladies Black Eyes To Save Unborn...

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SYCAMORE GLEN, TENNESSEE -- Reverend Bill Millen is a televangelist in his home state of Tennessee, and he describes himself as a "loud and...

God Shuts Down Heaven’s Sexual Predator And Despot Lines Prior To This Morning’s Prayer...

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KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- At the annual D.C. prayer breakfast this morning, held by some of the country's most powerful and influential members...

Local Woman Tends To Cuss A Lot When You Act Like A Goddamned F_...

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Megan Hofer, 35 years old and from Santa Chingada, California, admits that she has a "potty mouth." According to Megan, however, her tendency to...

One Woman’s Take: Roy Moore Was A Gift From God To All You Heathen...

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All of this kerfuffle over Roy Moore and the wonderful attention he showed the young girls in his community is completely overblown! A middle age...