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74 Year Old Toddler Posts Full Video of His “60 Minutes” Tantrum
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, the most powerful toddler in the free world posted video of his interview on "60 Minutes," which was conducted with...
Cousin Fucker Says He Wasn’t Fondling His Cousin Fucking Junk No Matter How Much...
One of the world's most famous cousin fuckers is denying that he was doing anything inappropriate in a now widely-discussed scene from an upcoming...
Through Tears of Joy, Lung Cancer Tells Radio Audience Its Stage 4 Limbaugh Infection...
CHINGADERO GORDO, FLORIDA -- Fighting through tears of joy, Lung Cancer told its radio audience today that it was "pleased and excited" to announce...
Ratcliffe: “Putin Has Assured Me Hunter Biden’s Laptop Isn’t Russian Disinformation”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning former Congressman John Ratcliffe, Director of National Intelligence, told Fox News host Maria Fartinromo that the laptop allegedly belonging...
Ivanka: “How Come Debates Are the Only Things Daddy Can Pull Out Of?”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Actual First Lady was, according to several sources close to the situation this afternoon, very confused. Word had just gotten...
Senate Republicans Fear Dems Will Smear Amy Coney Barrett With Her Own Actions, Words,...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Next week, the Senate Judiciary Committee, under chairmanship from Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC), will begin the confirmation process of Judge Amy...
American Dental Association Says Lying Through Your Teeth Greatly Increases Risk of Covid-19 Infection
The American Dental Association has issued a statement advising that there is a "heightened risk" of contracting the novel coronavirus, or COVID-19 the more...
Report: Coronavirus Devastated, Despondent, and Suicidal
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Donald Trump has promised the American people several times in the last eight months he would defeat the coronavirus. Now, hours...
300 lb. Toddler Throws 90-Minute Tantrum
CLEVELAND, OHIO -- A massive, 300-pound orange toddler stood on a stage with former Vice President Joe Biden last night and threw what scholars...
Eric Finds Daddy’s Next Tax Payment in White House Sofa Cushions
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- "Daddy! Daddy! Come quick! I just found a butt load of money, and we can keep it all, Daddy!"
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