Home Search
President Trump - search results
If you're not happy with the results, please do another search
75 Million Americans Wipe and Flush
It took a few days. It took counting millions of mail-in ballots under the pressure of a sea of angry, ignorant masses demanding they...
74 Year Old Toddler Claims Victory Without Actually Winning
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last night, before the entire nation, a 74 year old toddler claimed victory. However, as facts bear out, he didn't actually...
State Law Requires Every Nevada Resident to Inspect and Approve Each Counted Ballot
NEVADA -- Why in the world is it taking it so long for Nevada to count its votes? That's the question on many Americans'...
Palpatine Declares Himself Chancellor With Millions of Votes Left to Count From Outer Rim
CORUSCANT -- Naboo Senator Sheev Palpatine has declared himself the winner of the Republic's election, and says he is now the rightful Chancellor of...
Cruz Awaits Poll Closings and News About Whether His Wife Will Be Ugly Another...
FUCKFACE, TEXAS -- Canadian-born-Super-Texan-Cowboy-Elite-Ivy-League-Lawyer Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) told his staff this morning during a conference call and prayer session that he's "extremely nervous"...
Biden Plans to Deploy Official Democrat Antifa Squads In the Event of Post-Election Civil...
SCHLANGE LAKE, FLORIDA -- Just after concluding a campaign stop in Florida this morning, Democratic presidential candidate Joe Biden told reporters that if he...
Televangelist Publishes “MAGA-Friendly” Bible Just Three Pages Long
HOLY OAK, VIRGINIA -- Bill Millen, a self-described "televangelist for Trump," told his flock today that he has released a new, "MAGA-friendly" edition of...
Dinesh D’Souza Can’t Quite Bring Himself to Call Klansman a “Liberal” to His Hooded...
IDIOTA, MONTANA -- While on a publicity tour promoting his latest project he calls a "film," conservative firebrand author and convicted felon Dinesh D'Souza...
Ivanka: “America Needs the Leadership of Small Hands and Even Smaller Genitals”
OLD BALLS, FLORIDA -- Addressing a rally for her father, held in a small city just a few miles south of Orlando, First Lady...
Man Regrets His Early Vote for Hunter Biden’s Laptop
KOCKWAHRT, RHODE ISLAND -- There is an old phrase you probably have never heard of, rooted in what we believe is an ancient language...
