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Greenwald Will Denounce Ukraine Invasion Just as Soon as Putin Says He Can
For several weeks, as U.S. intelligence agencies tried to warn the world that Vlad Putin was preparing to invade Ukraine, super-journalist Glenn Greenwald --...
DeSantis Politely Asked Neo-Nazi to Step Aside So He Could Scold Students Wearing Masks
TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDUH -- Yesterday, Sunshine State Governor and 2021's Donald Trump Impersonator of the Year recipient Ron DeSantis was appearing at a photo op...
D.C. Sewage Plant Apologizes For Letting Two Turds Escape During Biden’s State of the...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- At some point in the past, two turds escaped from a sewage treatment plant in the nation's capital, and wound-up attending...
DeSantis Bans Rainbows From Appearing After Florida Rainstorms
Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis (Q) is expected to sign a bill into law when it comes to his desk that will ban the discussion...
After a Rough First Year, Satan Says He’s Adjusting to Living So Close to...
https://youtu.be/TiTMKhp5u9s
One year ago, a man moved into the permanent residents' area of Hell, one of the afterlife's oldest apartment complexes. Since that day, Satan...
Gazpacho Police Announce Massive Counterfeit Oyster Cracker Bust
https://youtu.be/hqWJDFRyc2w
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Nancy Pelosi's personal law enforcement squad, the Gazpacho Police, held a press conference today to announce what their chief called the...
Maybe If Real Women Would Talk to Me, I Wouldn’t Get So Worked Up...
The following editorial was submitted to Alternative Facts by William Terwilliger Jones, a popular Bible Belt podcaster. Mr. Terwilliger Jones is the host of "Christ-y White...
New Fashion Trend: Wearing Your IQ on Your Hat
There's a hot new fashion trend these days, and we just had to report on it because we know how important it is to our...
Marco Rubio Will Condemn January 6th as Soon as the Armed Trump Supporter Says...
Senator Marco Rubio believes that the events of January 6th are shameful, violent, and deserve to be condemned in the strongest terms possible, which...
Boebert Gives Up Right to Vote, Bear Arms, & Hold Office Because the Constitution...
"The Constitution is not evolving. To say that spits in the face of every single one of our founders." - Congressdumb Lauren Boebert (Q-CO),...
