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Trump Warns His Enemies Not To Interfere In 2020 Election By Voting For The...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Though there are still several months left before the primary season comes to a close, President Donald Trump is already in...
Trump Accuses ‘Mr. Dow Jones’ of Being a Never Trumper
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump lashed out angrily at "Mr. Dow Jones" in a heated tirade on the White House lawn this morning....
Trump Boasts More People Will Die from His ‘Biggest and Best’ Pandemic Than Any...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- For a couple of weeks now, President Donald Trump and his administration have done everything in their power to look both...
DNC Says Next Presidential Debate Will Be Bare Chested Brawl Between Biden and Sanders
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Democratic National Committee has decided that the next debate in the 2020 primary season will be a bare chested brawl...
Trump Now Requires Everyone to Get Coronavirus Test Before Kissing His Ass
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump has instituted a new White House visitation policy that will require any and all Congressional Republicans who show...
CDC Recommends Americans Quarantine Themselves From President Trump
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Centers for Disease Control issued new guidance this morning, urging Americans to quarantine themselves from a virus they say "is...
Mark Meadows Named White House Grand Imperial Chief of Staff
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, Donald Trump announced that his loyal and faithful servant, Chief of Staff Mick Mulvaney had left his royal court, and...
Trump Awards Tiger Woods Presidential Medal of Adultery
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last year, President Donald Trump gave golf champion Tiger Woods a medal that he said is "near and dear" to him,...
CDC Issues Guidelines for Safe Handjobs During Coronavirus Outbreak
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Centers for Disease Control issued a new set of guidelines to Americans today, aiming to teach them the "proper, hygienic...
Republican: Free College Plans Set America on a ‘Dangerous Path’ to Intelligent People
THIRD PINE, OHIO -- Senators Bernie Sanders and Liz Warren both have made the idea of some free college for U.S. citizens major components...
