Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Donald Trump Debuts ‘Make Earth Flat Again’ Slogan

Donald Trump's new slogan eschews subtlety.

Texas Republican Invents Shrinking Ray to ‘Make Government So Small It Fits In Your Pee-Hole’

Republicans in Texas are enlisting science in the name of shrinking government.

Obama’s Gun Confiscation Count: Week #381

Obama's Gun Confiscation rattles on, but can freedom do the same?!

Nation’s Females and Minorities Relieved They Won’t Be Asked to Be Trump’s VP

New polling shows relief among women and minorities at not being considered for Trump's VP.

South Carolina’s Attorney General ‘Looking Into’ Prosecuting God for Miscarriages

The pressure to end abortions in South Carolina is reaching a fever pitch.

SC Gov. To Start Nightly Rotation ‘Staking Out’ Different Women’s Uteruses

Governor Nikki Haley of South Carolina really wants to keep those unborn fetuses safe.

DNC Unveils New Democrat-Branded Nose Plugs

A look at some new campaign merch from the DNC.

Local Republican Proposes City-Wide Genital Registration Program

This Republican has a unique idea for calming down trans-bathroom panic.