Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Obama’s Gun Confiscation Count: Week #413

Do you have one, two, or 15 guns? Are they safe from the purloining paws of the Secret Commie, Kenyan, Socialist Dictator?

Putin Sends Trump Special Necklace With Leash To Commemorate His Inauguration

Vladimir Putin sends President-Elect and alleged billionaire Donald J. Trump a very, very special present to commemorate his inauguration.

Ann Coulter, Tammy Lahren To Host Trump Inaugural ‘Hanging Party’

Ann Coulter and Timmy Lahren are teaming up to host a party on the day that Donald Trump is sworn into office as the 45th president.

Orange Man Who Pushed Racist Lie For Years Now Upset He May Be Victim Of Fake News

If anyone knows about what's real and what's fake news, it's the guy who pushed a fake news story about Obama's birth certificate.

Trump: Golden Showers Were Just ‘A Different Kind Of Trickle Down Economics’

He's not copping to it, but if he did, Trump says there's a perfectly good, non-perverted reason he was buying Golden Showers shows.

5 Fun Facts About Senator Jeff Sessions

Need to know about our next Attorney General, Jeff Sessions? Look no further than this set of fun factoids, lovingly curated.

U.N. Security Council To Vote On Designating Trump’s Twitter Account A “Weapon of Ass Destruction”

The United Nation's Security Council is debating whether or not to attach a special label to the Twitter account of America's next president.

Sean Hannity Mistakenly Gropes Tucker Carlson

When he agreed to take over for Megan Kelly, did Fox News' Tucker Carlson know about all the perks and fringe benefits of the job?

Meryl Streep’s Third Oscar Agrees That She’s Overrated

A surprising story from someone very close to acclaimed, award winning actress Meryl Streep, who ran afoul of President-Elect Trump

Oklahoma Republicans Consider Banning History

Oklahoma, where the anti-academics come sweeping down the plain.