Totally Bulls*it News

Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

Totally Bulls*it News James Schlarmann -
"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity and politics don't mix." Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Project...
Read more
Criminal Justice

Chris Christie Only Customer in Dunkin’ Donuts He Closed Due to ‘Health and Safety Concerns’

Governor Chris Christie has a 15% approval rating, and getting caught in a doughnut shop he'd closed to the public probably won't help matters much.
James Schlarmann -
MAGA News

President Trump Hopeful He’ll Finish Mix Tape For Putin Before He’s Impeached

Trump is reportedly lost in song, trying to put together the perfect mix tape for his newfound love, Russian President Vladimir Putin.
James Schlarmann -
MAGA News

Vegas Bookies: CNN 7 Million to 1 Favorites Against 71-Year Old Orange Tub of Lard in Real Wrestling Match

The people in charge of making odds in Las Vegas have given President Trump astronomical odds to overcome in a hypothetical wrestling match with CNN.
James Schlarmann -
MAGA News

Arkansas Dog Wonders When Sarah Huckabee Sanders Will Address Her Brother’s Morality Problem

When describing the issues facing Chicago's gun violence problem, Sarah Huckabee Sanders said the city has a "morality" problem. This dog scoffed at that.
James Schlarmann -
MAGA News

Diarrhea Spewing Fire Hose Sees No Problems With Trump’s Hate Tweets

Not everyone thinks President Trump's unhinged, mean-spirited tweets diminish the presidency. This hose in Tennessee, for example.
James Schlarmann -
Pew Pew!

NRA to Host Fourth of July Celebration at Fort Sumter

While the NRA's latest ad has eyebrows going up all over the country, they're planning a Fourth of July celebration at Fort Sumter.
James Schlarmann -
MAGA News

Trump: ‘When the President Stalks, Bullies, Harasses and Blackmails, It’s Not Illegal’

President Donald Trump's feud with Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski rolls on. Now with allegations that the president used a tabloid to intimidate them.
James Schlarmann -
MAGA News

Spray-Tanned Sexual Predator with Low Approval Ratings Mocks “Morning Joe” Host’s Looks & Ratings

President Donald J. Trump took a couple of mean-spirited swipes at "Morning Joe" and its co-hosts this morning on Twitter.
James Schlarmann -
MAGA News

NASA Asks Trump to Take Down Fake Fake Moon Landing Picture from Oval Office

Alex Jones gave President Trump a falsified fake moon landing photo, and NASA is not happy about it.
James Schlarmann -
MAGA News

A Quick Reference Guide to the Senate Republicans’ Formerly Secret Healthcare Plan

A view of the proposed changes within the secretive Republican healthcare plan from a 50,000 foot level.
James Schlarmann -
1...421422423...578Page 422 of 578

Past Posts

© James Schlarmann All Material is Satirical