Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Trump Suggests Black Athletes’ Constitutional Rights Be Reduced By 2/5

"I'm not saying all urbans. I'm saying SOME urbans."

Republican Pretty Sure Harvey Weinstein Story Exonerates Donald Trump

LAC TÊTE DE MERDE, MICHIGAN -- 35-year-old Republican voter Bo McGriff doesn't...

Major League Baseball Officially Renames Strikeout a “Trump Muslim Ban”

"We're also thinking of renaming the Washington Nationals to the Washington White Nationalists while Trump's in office."

Trey Gowdy Promises to Investigate Niger Until He Finds Connection to Hillary Clinton and Benghazi

I don't care how long it takes, we will find the truth about Niger and Hillary Clinton."

Conservative Commentator Wonders If Hillary Will Apologize Husband’s White House Farts

"Harvey Weinstein probably doesn't wanna end up on Killary's totally real, totally confirmed kill list."

Trump Says He’d Have Acknowledged Four Dead Soldiers in Niger if Country Had ‘Less Obama-ish Name’

"I kept seeing the word Niger in my briefings and thought it was just another bullet item about something the last president messed up."

Trump Demands Congress Strip NFL and Its Players of First Amendment Rights

"That arcane constitution really should be reviewed."

Pence Clarifies: “I Said I Hope All The Gays Are Well-Hung”

"I prolly think about butt sex more than people who are currently engaging in butt sex."

‘Cảm ơn bạn Ông Orange Man’ says Vietnam as Trump Announces New Line of ‘AUTOGRAPH’ ties.

Available in a range of colors from Ku Klux White to Murderous Red.