Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Obama Suing President Trump For Libel

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In court documents filed today, former President Barack...

Woman Mildly Comforted By Knowledge That As Bad As Today Was, It Can Always Be Worse Tomorrow

Helen Nguyen considers herself a "pragmatic realist." Recently, she had her...

Man Worried He Has To Get Swastika Tattoo If He Has Criticisms Of “The Last Jedi”

A local man in his late thirties expressed concerns this week...

Taco Bell Taps Charlie Daniels To Promote Their New IllumiNachos Bell Grande

Country music legend Charlie Daniels is not a fan of The...

Stephen Miller Waits In Front Of Flagpole After School For Jake Tapper

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- The Internet was abuzz after White...

Literal Piece Of Shit Considers Challenging Arpaio For AZ Senate Seate

GRIFFIN BEACH, ARIZONA -- Sheriff Joe Arpaio, the 85 year old...

20 Pictures Of Puppies So Smug They’ll Make You Scream

Everyone loves puppies! They're so darn cute and cuddly! Well, that...

Trump Disappointed He Didn’t Get To Meet Old McDonald After He Spoke To Farm Bureau

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Yesterday, President Trump visited and spoke to the...

President Trump Overheard Practicing National Anthem

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Walking onto the field to hearty boos, last...